In Love With Another

In Love With Another
I’m torn. My girlfriend of nine months has started talking to her ex-boyfriend again. They weren’t talking for the first five months of our relationship.
Debbie told me that she and Todd said they’d always be friends. They were together two years, and she broke up with Todd because he demanded a lot of her. She had to come to his house or his parents’ house every night. The parents pressured her into marrying Todd. They would put chores on her like going out and buying their groceries. They paid for the groceries, but they expected her to do it because she was their son’s girlfriend.
Debbie and Todd got a dog at the Humane Society. Debbie’s mom was allergic to the dog, so Todd took it in. He now loves the dog, and Debbie knows it would not be fair to ask him to part with it after a year and a half. Debbie tells me she and Todd are only friends, but I feel he is trying to get her back. They have been talking a lot. She goes out to dinner or out for drinks with him. She says nobody understands their relationship—not his friends or hers.
This is two people who used to sleep together. But she claims the feelings are gone. They are only friends. How can I get over this? How can I build trust? I feel bad because I do love Debbie. I’m jealous a bit. It’s an ugly thing, and I’m trying to get over it.
Brodie

Brodie, on the surface your letter is about jealousy. But there is a difference between irrational jealousy and having a girlfriend who is dating her ex.
Most of us have seen photos of zebras on a plain, grazing on grass, a pride of lions only a short distance away. How can zebras graze so close to danger?
The answer is flight distance. Flight distance is the distance an animal allows around itself before it will flee. It is a calculation of risk. Zebras that correctly calculate flight distance are well-fed. They get the tastiest grass. Zebras which don’t get eaten.
Debbie broke up with Todd because his parents were taking advantage of her and showed their hand too early. If they waited until she was married to him, it would have been harder for her to escape.
We would normally give her kudos for standing up and balking at a guy who didn’t protect her from his parents’ abuse. But she lost all the points from us when she continued to have contact with him.
After five months, her ex let her get unmad. He let her miss him. She had a five-month break from his parents’ chores. Either Todd is like his parents—something of a taker—and that appeals to her, or he won’t stand up to his parents.
When Debbie says no one else would understand their relationship, it means she knows she is going against her better judgment. What she said was, in effect, all of you would say don’t do this, but I am going to do it anyway.
Your problem isn’t jealousy. Your problem is your girlfriend is not over her feelings for another man.
People moving on after a relationship often have unresolved feelings or lie to themselves that they are over it. Nine months ago, Debbie calculated the correct flight distance from Todd and his family. Now she is waffling. As a result, his family may devour her.
Wayne & Tamara
Send letters to: DirectAnswers@WayneAndTamara.com

DIGESTION TIP:

DIGESTION TIP:
Starting your morning with a healthy elixir is a great way to alkalinize your body, support digestion and improve detoxification
Some of my favourite morning mixes will include spinach, wheat grass, dandelion leaf, spirulina, lemon juice a activated charcoal. These promote digestion and detoxification in 2 important ways: .
1) Promote liver health by supporting liver detoxification and improving the flow of BILE from our liver and gallbladder. Adequate bile production and flow is SO important to properly break down and digest our fats as well as carry excess hormones and cholesterol out of the body. If you suffer from high cholesterol, symptoms of low essential fats (dry skin, hair, cracked nails) and/or hormonal imbalances, you want to support your liver’s production and flow of bile.

2) Green superfoods and even lemons help to alkalinize the body. Being too acidic (lower pH level in the body) is associated with lowered oxygenation which negatively affects digestive function and rate of digestion. When food takes longer to digest, it can ferment causing fermentation acid to build up which then worsens the sensation of heartburn and bloating/gas.
How do you become less acidic? By eating a more alkaline diet and starting your morning with a greens drink or elixir! It is also important to avoid or limit foods that increase acidity in the body such as refined sugar, red meat, processed foods, fried foods and refined oils like canola oil.

If you enjoy these tips and suffer from digestive issues and/or hormonal issues, you will love my Bikini Bod Beat the Bloat Ebook + Holistic Detox Bundle It comes with a *4 week digestive healing and detox meal plan *All recipes, pictures and instruction, *Digestive healing + Detox supplement guide, an overview of the digestive system and common culprits to your digestive distress, and my favourite resources to detox your life today! More info at www.marissaliana.com. Get started today!
                                             Until next time, stay well! Marissa

Travelling Anywhere? If So, Don’t Believe These Myths

Travelling Anywhere? If So, Don’t Believe These Myths

              What’s the worst of times when travelling? It’s when you’re sitting on a bus tour 100 miles from the next stop and you begin to suffer the bowel spasms of traveller’s diarrhea. If the worst scenario happens, it’s a moment you will never forget. But this common risk, and the chance of acquiring other infections, can be decreased by ridding yourself of several travellers’ myths.

Myth:  Only in the Amazon jungle do you have to worry about mosquito-transmitted diseases.

Fact:  That’s not so. In the jungle, mosquitoes spread disease to humans by biting infected monkeys. In a cafe in Paris, Rome or Istanbul, mosquitoes infect you after biting infected humans.

Myth:  So, to prevent this infection in a Paris café, you’ll have two glasses of chardonnay.

Fact: I wish it were true! Laboratory studies show that wine helps to decrease food-borne diseases such as E.coli and Salmonella. This action may be related to the organic acids in wine which have the effect of alcohol. A couple of observational studies also show that those who consumed wine or beer at meals were less likely to become ill during salmonella outbreaks than non-drinkers. But no studies prove alcohol in any form is protective against infectious disease.

Myth:  It’s impossible to get rabies if a street dog just licks you.

Fact:  A report in the University of California Wellness publication says that most people believe you must be bitten by an infected dog to get rabies. Not true. The message is, don’t get too friendly with a foreign Fido. It’s rare, but if you have a cut, open wound, or abrasion, and it’s licked by an infected dog, you could develop this disease. This is also true for infected racoons, foxes and bats. One night in my teens, I was awakened by something flying around my bedroom. My parents diagnosed a bad dream. That is, until the following evening a bat flew out from a lamp. Experts say I should have been tested for rabies as a bite from a bat is hard to see.

Myth:  Probiotic supplements prevent traveller’s diarrhea.

Fact:  This is another misconception. Several studies published in Travel Medicine and Infectious Disease in 2007 suggested that different kinds of probiotic organisms may prevent this problem. But other studies concluded they have no benefit. So let the buyer beware.

Myth:  Suppose you were born in a foreign country and decide now is the time to return. Some people believe revisiting your homeland protects you from illness.

Fact:  Sad to say, going home is not risk free. It is true that early in life in a foreign country you can build up an immunity to water and infections transmitted by mosquitoes. But immunity has often faded away by the time you return. The Centers for Disease Control report that people who emigrate to North America from countries where malaria is endemic, such as India, are at high risk when they return home or visit other malarial –prone areas. And sometimes the person returning home decides against taking anti-malarial medication. The only places that are risk free of malaria is where there are no mosquitoes, such as the desert, high altitudes or during cold seasons of the year.

Myth: Taking medication for malaria will protect you from other mosquito-bearing diseases.

Fact:  Don’t believe it.  Other diseases such as Zita and Dengue are also spread by mosquitoes. But they are caused by different organisms. Consequently, treatment to prevent one of these diseases will have no effect on others.

Myth: When you begin a trip, it doesn’t matter what seat you ask for on a plane, whether you want to look out the window or prefer easy exit from an aisle seat.

Fact: Sorry, it’s not that simple. Studies show the window seat is safer. Why? Because bacteriological studies prove the aisle seat harbours more bacteria that can cause infection. Maybe you’ve noticed that many people, after using the bathroom on board, return to their seats by clutching the aisle seat headrest. It’s sad to say that many have not washed their hands. Need I say more?      
  Online docgiff.com Comments info@docgiff.com

A POT-TY SITUATION by Joe Ingino

A POT-TY SITUATION
    The debate to legalize the use of recreational marijuana is over.   Soon the government will make it legal for citizens to indulge in recreational marijuana.  Much like everything in society.  Enough people support a particular social change.  The change will take place.   Traditional values and standards will be compromise to accommodate a new acceptance.   In the recreational use of marijuana it appears that the containment has over turned the establishment.  It seems like everyone is using.
With this thought.  The government in it’s usual conscious fashion... turns around and looks for ways to capitalize on the overturn... on the ‘POPULAR’ position in society.
Sure the Feds and the Provinces sit to make huge tax revenue off this new Goose that will be laying the new Green/Golden egg.   The Federal government still can’t make up it’s mind how to distribute it..on what way will bring them the most revenue.  All they know is that the legislation was approved and passed and now the pandora’s box will have to be accommodated by the Provinces and the municipalities.
Some are crying ‘GREAT’ finally.   Others are grinding their teeth.  No matter what your personal preference is.  One thing we share is civil responsibility.

I do not smoke and or drink.  I can appreciate my air clean and my communities safe.  I can also respect those that wish to smoke and drink.  It is a free country.   I do become offended by smoke... second hand.  I do have a problem with noticing someone walking down the street intoxicated.   These concerns appear that they are not mine alone, but that a large margin of the population also share them.
The other day I was getting into my car and I was approached by a very prominent local business person and asked.   “You are running for office, I am a concerned business person and parent.  How will you protect my family from second hand smoke at public places?  How will you protect my business that a retail pot shop will not open next door?”

At first, the question had so many parts.  Then I looked at him and said.   It is a matter of waiting to see what the Federal government regulates and how to the Provinces and subsequently to municipalities.   We must also wait to see what this will mean for the different provinces.  Will each province be allowed to regulate distribution and places of usage.   Once this is established then we as a municipality can begin to assure that we do not have issues of use of marijuana in public places.   Much like with alcohol.  Oshawa should have clear bylaws on where and how a person may consume marijuana.   I would strongly push that there be no smoking on public streets, near schools and or at any public venue.
I also would propose that even though legal.  It is the responsibility of the user to assure that if found to over indulge that they be held accountable by law.   A fine, jail time... depending on the severity.  Much like how we deal with drunk drivers.
As the new mayor of your city my first and biggest priority would be the protection of our citizens.  The safety and well being of each one.  Including the use of marijuana for medicinal and or recreation.

As for distribution within the City of Oshawa.  I would learn from the mistakes of previous administrations and not bound the sale to any particular place.  I wanted it spread out and widely available so the stigma will not linger at those shops that sell them.  In the name of protecting our citizens. I will also impose a ‘POT’ tax levy on any and all businesses selling.  In the form of licensing.   Before licensing.  We would conduct a 7 day wait period in which at that time neighbors would have the opportunity to oppose the licensing of such business or existing business that wants to get into the sale of pot.   The license would be hefty and renewable every month.   The key is not to punish the retailer.  But to use money from such lucrative business to invest in city programs.  (ie. kids sports, park improvements...)

Then the question was further pursued... ‘How would you deal with dwellers of apartment and or subdivision smoke related complaints.   Technically individuals would be on their property yet the strong smell of pot would linger.’ 
This is another great question.  As it stand we have smokers both of cigarettes and cigars.  If you happen to be living next to one.  I can appreciate your frustrations.   In this case it becomes a matter of basic human decency as in many cases approaching your neighbor and expressing your concern over foul smell would be enough.

In the pot model.  We as must not presume the same would be true.  Even though second hand  cigarette/cigar smoke is harmful and offensive to some.  Pot smoke carries a much more dangerous over tone.
Pot smoke must be addressed as not only possibly offensive but a  health harmful due to it’s medicinal properties.
Then as your new mayor how do we handle this.  Pass an environmental bylaw.  A bylaw that would prohibit you from smoking out in a residential or business area where others may smell the smoke.  A bylaw that would be enforced by fines.  The question then is how do we enforce.
Well, like any complaint.  It has to be investigated.  Those that file the complaint must make available evidence of such contravention in the form of pictures, witnesses.   The fundamental principle behind this bylaw would be not to create a tear between neighbors but to build bridges of understanding and civility.
If a situation escalates, the police and the proper civil avenues are available to both parties.  We as a City must assure that our citizens have quality life style.  Part of that quality is doing your part in the community.  Hostility will be met with hostility.  Compassion with compassion.
One thing we forget about the whole pot argument.   As great as it may be for medicinal purposes and as great as it may be for the prevention of future disease.   Marijuana has been proven to be the second step towards much deeper narcotics.    First it is alcohol, then pot, then narcotics.
The key to breaking this vicious and at times fatal cycle is education and resources to offer individual that show distress.   Addiction is not a choice per se but a way to cope with serious underlying psychological issues.
We as a society must address this with hard core therapeutic services.   We must look at ways of creating one of Canada’s largest and most recognized addiction treatment centres.  
Can it be done?
In my world nothing is impossible as long as you have th vision and the ability to bring people together to make it happen.
As your new mayor I would be committed 24/7 to making things happen in our city. 
I will not wait for Council to decide but have council work on things as they are happening. No more wasting time on what could be.  No more letting opportunity pass us by.
Tomorrow is here and we need not to sleep.   In 2018 we have a true unique opportunity to make great things happen in Oshawa.   You have a choice.  Vote in Carter and live another four years with the status quo.  Or vote INGINO and take a chance on positive change. Your choice.
THANK YOU
Joe Ingino
With your help we can make it happen. Vote Ingino for mayor in 2018
www.ingino.org         Joe Ingino