Spirits

from Wayne & Tamara I was looking for the miraculous "answer to my life," when I came across your column. I don't have anyone to ask for a neutral opinion so I am hoping you can give me some insight. I met my husband when I was 18 and started dating him when I was 21. In 1991, shortly after I moved in with him, he lost his license for drunk driving after a Christmas party. I always had an excuse for him. His parents were alcoholics, well-known in town for their successful businesses and lack of success in family life. Fast forward to three years ago. The kids were affected by our arguments and knowing "daddy drinks too much." One night my husband actually dropped our son on his head. I finally had it. I gave him an ultimatum. If he wanted to sulk about the past and drink, he could do it without me and the children. He vowed to quit forever and checked into rehab and did counseling. We moved to a new town with new friends. I don't expect perfection, but I do expect honesty and he can't tell me the truth. He claims to go to AA meetings in towns that don't have AA meetings. How can I respect or be intimate with someone who lies? On top of that he has an anger problem. Not physically, but sometimes I wish he would just hit me. As crazy as it sounds, it would make my decision easier. As I type this, man, it seems so clear. I have to get out of here, but I grew up not believing in divorce. Sharon Sharon, you say you don't believe in divorce as if you are saying you don't believe in ghosts. But divorce exists, and it exists for a reason. When one person in the marriage won't participate, and the children are being damaged, that is a reason for divorce. Even now you are excusing your husband. You say he lost his license after a Christmas party. Christmas has nothing to do with it. He was drunk. He is still drunk. There aren't any miraculous answers to your life, but there are realistic ones. You've tried patience, understanding, rehab, and counseling. It hasn't gone anywhere. Tamara Just Say No I seem to be in an impossible situation. I am 31 and never married. I work as a software developer and am quite happy in my current living situation. But my family is pestering me to at least consider marriage, even saying they can find me girls. I don't want to get married. I've never had a girlfriend or even dated in my life. I've learned to be content without any romantic relations, and I don't want to start. Even though I live a long way from my parents, they talk to me on the phone about it every day. This affects my ability to enjoy life, which is a big part of being single. I enjoy my freedom and don't want to give it up just because everyone expects me to get married and have a family. Is there any way out of getting married? I know I can be happy living by myself, and don't like to consider marriage and children. Dev Dev, we are not the property of our parents. At some point, our lives become our own. When your parents urge you to marry, remember it is not a wish for you. It is a wish for themselves. Sometimes it is easier to stand up for someone else. It would be a great injustice to any woman if you marry her against your will. Every day your mom and dad can ask you to marry, but they cannot stop you from saying no every single time. Wayne SEND LETTERS TO: Directanswers@WayneAndTamara.com Wayne & Tamara are the authors of Cheating in a Nutshell and The Young Woman’s Guide to Older Men—available from Amazon, Apple, and booksellers everywhere.

Some Advice Never Ages

By W. Gifford-Jones MD and Diana Gifford After 10 books, over 2,500 columns, and nearly 50 years of writing it, some things bear repeating. This week revisits a column from three decades ago about how to prepare for surgery. Has anything changed? From that old column, “What would God do if He were a surgeon? If it is true God helps those who help themselves, He would refuse to operate on many, telling us, ‘Respect your own God-given body and then I’ll do what I can.’” Next came a case. “A 45-year-old woman underwent an operation for extensive vaginal repair. For this type of surgery, her surgeon warned her repeatedly about the hazards of smoking and her persistent smoker’s hack. Ten days later she was rushed to hospital because of sudden post-operative hemorrhage. Incredibly, she was still smoking and coughing convulsively as she lay in a pool of blood in the emergency room. Speedy surgery stopped the bleeding.” Then another case. “A 45- year-old diabetic weighing 275 pounds was admitted to the hospital due to an acute gallbladder attack. A skilled surgeon removed the organ, but a lifetime of bad habits began slowly to take its toll. The patient’s diabetes was hard to control and the incision in the pendulous abdomen became infected. Shortly after, the patient developed pneumonia, phlebitis, and blood clots in the lungs. Family members watched the complications multiply and the situation deteriorate. When the patient succumbed to overwhelming odds, the family demanded of the surgeon, ‘Why did this happen? Why couldn’t you have done something?’” It needs no repeating what that column reported next. Suffice to say, the surgeon answered truthfully that the patient’s weight, smoking, and lack of exercise caused the death. Let’s read on. “No doctor turns away a patient who has an acute surgical problem. But patients can’t expect doctors to work miracles with surgery when they haven’t given a tinker’s damn about their bodies for years. I think God would agree it’s time to issue an ultimatum to everyone. God and surgeons shouldn’t attempt the impossible. And patients should be expected to help themselves by shaping up.” The article then gave advice on how pre-operative patients can prepare for an operation, physically and mentally. “Surgery, like tennis or football, demands psychological preparation. A good start is to get rid of needless worries. Tell the doctor if you are overcome by a fear of not surviving the surgery. Of if you’re concerned about post-operative pain. Or confused about which organs will be removed. And if you’re apprehensive about the length of the incision, remember Abe Lincoln’s remark. He was once asked, ‘How long should a man’s leg be?’ He replied, ‘Just long enough to reach the ground.’ Incisions, like legs, are just long enough to do the job safely. “The main thrust of preparation should be directed at good physical conditioning. Some of these tragedies could be prevented if patients tossed away cigarettes before an operation or made a genuine attempt to control and lose weight. “My advice is to be prepared for possible surgery all of the time. This means having a lifelong respect for mind and body. It would give surgeons fewer gray hairs. Fewer families would be asking why post-operative complications occurred. And I’m sure God would be more willing to help those who help themselves.” There you have it. While surgical techniques may have improved greatly over 30 years, have patients heeded the age-old call to prepare for surgery? Doing so would give surgeons a much-needed break in tough cases. And starting early enough may even prevent the need for going under the knife in the first place Sign-up at www.docgiff.com to receive our weekly e-newsletter. For comments, contact-us@docgiff.com. Follow us Instagram @docgiff and @diana_gifford_jones

The Slow Death of Democracy

By Lisa Robinson - Pickering City Councillor Democracy is the cornerstone of our society, and today it is facing a grave and gradual threat. Rights that were once seen as fundamental pillars of our freedom are being quietly taken away, piece by piece, in various aspects of our lives. From the suppression of freedom of speech during council meetings, to trespass notices being given to ordinary citizens for not obeying orders and/or for posting their dissenting views or disdain for certain politicians on social media should not be taken lightly. There is also the consolidation of power in the hands of a few and a matter of profound apprehension that the word “racism” is being misused to unjustly label and stigmatize individuals who hold differing opinions or dissenting views. With these in mind, to only name a few, I feel our democracy is slowly succumbing to a dangerous erosion. One of the most alarming signs of the slow death of democracy is the suppression of freedom of speech, particularly in council meetings and other government institutions like our schools. More and more, we are seeing Pickering citizens having their voices stifled, their concerns dismissed, and their right to express opinions restricted. This censorship is a direct attack on the principles that underpin a democratic society, where open dialogue and discourse should be encouraged, not suppressed. By silencing these dissenting voices, those in power seek to manipulate the narrative and maintain control, undermining the very essence of democracy. You may ask yourself how does one suppress these dissenting voices. By unjustly attacking those who do not conform to a specific narrative by calling them names like racist, bigot, white supremacist, conspiracy theorist, or misogynist. Or simply by turning off their microphone during school meetings or council meetings and then falsely bringing forward allegations to an Integrity commissioner, or filing a complaint against the divergent at their place of business. Not to mention cyberbullying or online mocking. Ultimately, these tactics instill fear in others, preventing them from speaking up and expressing their opinions or raising concerns. Another concerning aspect of the erosion of democracy is the increasing consolidation of power in the hands of a select few. Using the Corporation of the City of Pickering as an example, there has been a shift in the power dynamics where the CAO is gradually gaining more and more authority that was previously held by the council. With the heightened authority of the CAO and the new establishment of strong mayoral powers, these two positions possess the capacity to effectively manage the city without extensive public engagement or reliance on the council in certain instances. This has already been demonstrated in many occurrences, including the exclusion of the Council’s participation in drafting the 2024 budget. While the concept of a strong mayor power may appear appealing on the surface to some, it risks undermining the checks and balances necessary for a healthy democracy. I have spoken in council on many occasions about how the concentration of power in the hands of a single individual limits the voices and perspectives of the very ones who should be helping in shaping the decision-making process. Unfortunately, my pleas fell on deaf ears, and now we are beginning to see the potential for authoritarian tendencies. This gradual erosion of power from the people to a few powerful figures usually goes unnoticed unless you are paying close attention to each move being played on the political chessboard. I for one do not believe in coincidences, so I encourage each and every one of you to watch the game very closely as each move is meticulously calculated, foreseeing at least three steps ahead. Even the implementation of Bylaws needs to be followed closely as they too are implemented at an early stage of the game, emphasizing the potential threats they pose to democratic values such as fair representation and transparent accountability. These strategic moves pose grave threats to democratic ideals. Even the noble fight against racism has been weaponized to stifle freedom of expression. Genuine efforts to combat racism have been hijacked, with dissenting opinions being labeled as, yes you guessed it, racist, bigot, or any other discriminatory flavour of the month. While it is crucial to address systemic injustices, it is equally important to ensure that our freedom of expression is protected. The misapplication of anti-racism measures to suppress differing viewpoints undermines the democratic principles of open debate and intellectual diversity. It is essential to strike a balance between addressing racism and safeguarding the right to hold and express diverse opinions. The slow death of democracy is occurring right before our eyes, in seemingly inconspicuous ways. The suppression of freedom of speech, the concentration of power, and the misuse of anti-racism measures are all contributing to this concerning trend. It is crucial for the citizens of Pickering and beyond to remain vigilant and vocal in defense of our democratic values. We must demand transparency, accountability, and the preservation of our fundamental rights from our governments and institutions. "Strength Does Not Lie In The Absence Of Fear, But In The Courage To Face It Head-On And Rise Above It"

JUSTICE DELAYED IS JUSTICE DENIED

Tahir Khorasanee, LL.M. Senior Associate, Steinbergs LLP The adage "justice delayed is justice denied" rings true, but beyond notions of fairness lies a realm of profound economic implications. Nowhere is this more apparent than in the Landlord and Tenant Board, where adjournments and delays can wield significant impact, particularly upon small-scale landlords, especially amid periods of heightened interest rates, inflation, and economic downturns. Ever wondered about the true cost of delays in our justice system? Brace yourself, because it's not just a matter of time. Picture this: almost half of all Canadians, over 18, find themselves tangled in at least one legal snafu within a mere three-year span. Despite this, many of us feel like strangers to the legal labyrinth, left out in the cold. But here's the kicker: legal hiccups are inevitable—they'll knock on your door sooner or later. And let me tell you, they come with a hefty price tag. These legal tangles don't just drain our wallets; they put a strain on our entire economy. Take, for instance, the chilling fact that every extra year spent resolving private disputes can send our growth rate spiraling downwards. So, when it comes to the cost of legal delays, it's not just a number—it's the very pulse of our economy that's at stake. Enter the Landlord and Tenant Board of Ontario, tasked with arbitrating disputes between property owners and tenants—an institution marred by excruciatingly prolonged delays. A recent ombudsman report laid bare the staggering backlog of over 38,000 pending cases, with landlords lodging nearly 90% of the grievances. These delays wield dire consequences, particularly for small-scale landlords. Small landlords, often owning just one or two rental properties, can be particularly affected by these delays. When tenants fail to pay rent or violate lease agreements, landlords must turn to the Landlord and Tenant Board for resolution. However, the long waiting times for hearings can lead to significant financial strain for landlords. For instance, one landlord reported that his tenants paid the first and last month’s rent to move in and immediately refused to pay rent, demanding cash for keys. Another reported becoming homeless so she could continue to pay the mortgage as her tenants refused to pay rent. There are numerous other stories of tenants destroying the landlord’s property, making it inhabitable, while the Landlord and Tenant Board continued to grant these tenants more time. Once the Landlord and Tenant Board makes an order for eviction and unpaid rent, which is often done after several attendances and significant delays, that is not the end of the road for the landlord, who must then pay additional legal and administrative fees to request the Sherif’s office to evict the tenant and later, pay additional legal and court fees to enforce the judgement at the Small Claims Court. In essence, the burden of tackling the housing crisis is disproportionately shouldered by small landlords—individuals who invest a lifetime's savings in pursuit of a modest retirement strategy. This predicament is further exacerbated during periods of economic turbulence, where soaring interest rates and inflation inflate borrowing and living costs, exacerbating financial strain. It seems the current landlord and tenant regime downloads the responsibility of addressing the housing crisis on the small landlord, who spends a lifetime scrouging to save just enough to purchase an investment property as part of his retirement strategy. This situation is exacerbated in times of high interest rates and inflation. These economic conditions increase the cost of borrowing and the cost of living, putting additional financial pressure on small landlords. For most landlords, the Landlord and Tenant Tribunal only exasperates the problem. The Tribunal takes far too long to evict tenants who refuse to pay rent, destroy the property in the process, and refuse to leave without being paid a hefty sum. Something must be done about this – perhaps a good start will be if all landlords refuse to pay cash for keys and go the distance, getting an order for eviction and unpaid rent and later enforcing it in court to make sure the tenants pays their dues. This may be the catalyst needed for meaningful reform, which is long overdue. In a time of economic recession, the impact of justice delays at the Landlord and Tenant Board is more pronounced. It is crucial to address these delays to support small landlords who are an integral part of the housing market and the broader economy. As we navigate these challenging economic times, ensuring timely access to justice is not just a matter of fairness – it is an economic imperative.

100 YEARS AND WE STILL CAN’T GET IT RIGHT...

By Joe Ingino Editor/Publisher ACCOMPLISHED WRITER/AUTHOR OF OVER 800,000 Published Columns in Canada and The United States “I live a dream in a nightmare world” Always Remember That The cosmic blueprint of your life was written in code across the sky at the moment you were born. Decode Your Life By Living It Without Regret or Sorrow. - ONE DAY AT A TIME - It has been 100 years. It should be a time to rejoice on how great our City has become. All the accomplishments and all the great people living within our city. A time to acknowledge all the great talent. Instead, our city is in peril. We have never faced such poor living conditions. Such high taxes and such poor quality of life. People living on the streets. Open use of drugs. Our downtown a shamble. Our municipal government is obsolete. We do not elect on merit or accomplishments. We have a council that is played by staff to their every whim. Councillors rule of thumb is do nothing and you be elected next election. Look at the last election. Look at what took place this past week. The mayor, council and his chosen staff decided to host a 100th anniversary event at the Regent Theatre. No advertising. No promotion. Just friends of the Mayor, his chosen staff. To ad insult to injury. Mayor Carter announces the erection of a 100th anniversary sign in front of City Hall. Another white elephant. A sign that says nothing... non informative. Just the number 100. This sign according to the City was paid by staff. The city is yet to confirm cost and or who really paid for the sign. The City in it’s arrogance had deemed the City as not having a newspaper. An insult to every downtown merchant and every business person outside of the Chamber of Commerce good old boys club. Not to mention the Durham Realty. A testament to the corrupt mentality. How dare they deem the city without a newspaper, when we been serving the City and Region for over 29 years.... We do not bow to the Good Old Boys mentality. We bring a service of delivering news. This is the same city that paid with your tax dollars to magazines like SNAP, The Express. All Good Old Boys club members... I feel for our founding fathers... This is not the Oshawa they wanted for future generations. A council made up of retiree's that are only in it to fluff up pension. Realtors, that are enjoying the taxpayers extra cash. The un-employable... people that out of office. No one would hire them to clean floors. A musician dead beat. A man that is supposed to be in charge of the downtown core... A pretty boy has been third rate actor/teacher/self professed artist. To be fair. Amongst the hay stack there is one lawyer. From the bunch, I feel the lawyer has the most potential but is kept in a dark room at city hall. As he is the only real threat to real thought and opinion. Sad that the Mayor would have used your tax dollar to create a pre-elections photo opportunity to better his political position in he community. I wonder if his actions are not against the Ontario Elections Act. After all. The 100th rendezvous was kept pretty much quiet and circulated among his supporters. I feel for future generations as we are not going forward to a better place. We are going back to the old wild wild west. Days people feared walking downtown or wondering due to fear off all kinds of unknown dangers. Happy 100th Oshawa.

The economy, the working class and the upcoming federal budget

by Maj (ret'd) CORNELIU. CHISU, CD, PMSC, FEC, CET, P. Eng. Former Member of Parliament Pickering-Scarborough East The Trudeau government will table its next budget on April 16, 2024. So it is time to take another look at what they intend or should do to redress our country’s economy, stop waste, and really look after the interests of the country and its citizens. Since first elected, the Trudeau government has escalated spending on new or expanded programs and services, financing it through government debt. From 2014/15 to 2022/23, the government increased annual program spending by approximately 75 per cent. If we adjust for population growth and inflation, the Trudeau government has recorded the five-highest years of per-person spending in Canadian history. All of this new spending has resulted in eight consecutive budget deficits under Prime Minister Trudeau, with six more projected until 2028/29. These deficits have contributed to an $867.2 billion increase in gross federal debt from 2014/15 to 2022/23. The federal government plans to spend more taxpayer dollars on debt interest ($46.5 billion) in 2023/24 than on child-care benefits ($31.2 billion). As a result, future generations will have to pay off a debt burden that’s nearly double what it was when Prime Minister Trudeau was elected in 2015. Let us face the crude reality. As the economic growth crisis deepens, the standard of living worsens. More to the point, the economy is now growing slower than the population, which is why per capita GDP is falling. The latest figures from Statistics Canada confirm that Canada suffered yet another decline in per capita GDP in the fourth quarter of 2023: the fifth decline in the past six quarters, the worst sustained drop in more than 30 years. Per capita GDP, after adjusting for inflation, is now below where it was in the fourth quarter of 2014, nine years ago. That has left living standards worse in the fourth quarter of 2023 than they were at the end of 2014. The result is an end to the belief that we are among the richest countries in the world. From placing sixth among OECD countries in GDP per capita in 1981, we have fallen to 15th place in 2022. We have been surpassed by countries like Ireland, the Netherlands, Austria, Sweden, Iceland, Australia, Germany, Belgium and Finland, who used to be poorer than we were. So what can we expect without a radical change in government policies; change the political class does not seem ready to even consider? Unless we find a solution quickly the economy will continue to shrink, and living standards will not be all that suffers. Everything they represent will suffer. A society that cannot look forward to a future of rising living standards is one that is deprived of one of the primary motivating forces of human behaviour – hope. Without the universal lubricant of growth, all of the divisions within a society – between the classes, between the generations, between sexes and races and regions – are likely to be more inflamed. What makes this especially depressing is that it is almost never discussed in our politics. Party leaders hammer away at each other over growth in the short term, though they can do very little to alter it. Long-term growth, which is more responsive to policy, barely rates a mention. What they think about the future of Canada is probably the farthest thing from their mind as they look for grab an illusive and short-lived imaginary power. For all the fruitless debates about macroeconomic stabilization policy, and which form of stimulus is most effective at raising growth in the short term, the long-term growth trajectory is blindly ignored. Yet it is the long-term growth of an economy that is really responsive to policy. Another major problem Canada continues to ignore is our alarming drop in productivity, which is closely connected to the extraordinary decline of business investment in Canada. Simply put, our workers are less productive than other countries’ workers because they have less capital to work with. Therefore, getting our investment rates up is obviously part of the solution. It matters, however, what you invest in, as much as how much you invest. The current trend in disaggregate and chaotic investment it is very troubling. While business investment in residential structures has roughly doubled as a percentage of GDP since 2000, investment in machinery and equipment has roughly halved, with our manufacturing industries destroyed to the benefit of other countries. Could this go some way towards explaining why our relative growth in productivity has fallen off so sharply since 2000? Have we been so busy capitalizing on rising housing prices that we have neglected to invest in the sorts of things that make it possible to afford a house? Over the last thirty years, manufacturing jobs have constituted a declining share of working-class employment. This is true even among men, for whom manufacturing employment went from a high of 20 percent of working-class jobs to only 13 percent today. Among women, manufacturing represents only 6 percent of working-class jobs. Conversely, jobs in sales and services have grown significantly over the same period. Today, almost half of the working class is employed in sales/service jobs. Among working-class women, it accounts for more than half. The trades continue to be an important part of working-class employment, but not skilled tradespeople with formal training, as was formerly the case. Today, it is mostly helpers and labourers who fall into the working class. Notably, immigrants are much more likely to find themselves in the working class than other Canadians, due to ancient and restrictive professional trade laws. Census data show that the longer an immigrant has been in Canada, the less likely he or she is a member of the working class. Fifty percent of immigrants who arrived in the previous five years found themselves in the working class, whereas only 34 percent—equivalent to the national average—of immigrants in Canada longer than 35 years did. In short, a member of this newly defined working class, is just as likely to be female, most likely working in sales or the service industry, and highly likely to be a recent immigrant. So major policy changes on housing, immigration, childcare, and education would show that our politicians are attuned to changing working-class dynamics and ready to fulfill the vision of a multi-ethnic, working-class coalition for the twenty-first century. Effective policies could help them enter the coveted and widely touted middle class; one that seems to be in decline at present, rather than on the rise. In conclusion, let us see what the visionaries of this year’s budget intend to bring to Canadians. “Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning.” – Albert Einstein.

17.31 REASONS

By Rosaldo Russo Allow me to begin this column by thanking the Oshawa/Central newspaper for allowing me the opportunity and access to the press. Not to many if any allow an average person like me to tell the world what I see and think. In my opinion. The Editor/Publisher is a real upstanding type of guy. He shoots from the hip and hold traditional core values. My name is Rosaldo Russo. I came to this great country to make a better life for myself and my family. I thank Canada for everything it has allowed me to do and earn. I worked construction all my life. I know the value of hard work and honesty. I remember as a boy my father always telling me to work hard and buy land. So I did. I remember days when I did not have enough to eat. I go to work... but I did not wait for hand outs. I rounded up my pride my skill and my determination to succeed and went to work. In those days the only benefits we received was the fact we were employed. Before retiring I was the owner and operator of local material supply company that allowed me to retired without worry. Now that I have time to enjoy life. I look around me and have some concern for future generations. I see that the world is finished. Did you hear the great news.... The government is increasing the minimum wage to $17.31... wow... how generous. Are the crazy or what? Who can survive making $17.31 an hour. Do the math on a 40 hour week. You barely make to pay rent. Forget food. Gas, insurance and utilities. How is it that Justin can send a 10 million dollar target...oops I mean tank to fight someone else's war in the Ukraine. Yet, our own people right here at home are starving and suffering even more than those at war. At the least those at war know it is war and tough times are a coming. But here in Canada. We live like we are in war. A war, against our own stupidity. Now don’t get me wrong. I am not professing that all and everyone get a free ride. As some have become generational system suckers. People that have no drive to do anything or contribute anything...and sit by the mailbox waiting for the cheque to come in. I don’t mean those. I mean the poor guy that just got married. The guy that wants to start a family but due to economics can’t. I once asked an uncle. Uncle, Vinnie. Why is it you only had one child. He looked at me in the face and said. I did not want to bring someone to this world to suffer. I could only afford one child and I loved him and tried to give them the best I could muster. His words echo in my heart every time I see a young person. When I hear of the government pulling this kind of shit. Announcing $17.31 as some great feat. It makes my blood boil. It makes me ashamed of being Canadian. I remember when I came to this country. I denounced my home and native land. I pledged that if I ever was called to serve that I give my life for my government. Today, no much so as I would not give it for my government. Instead I would give it fighting my governments policy and agenda. Come on let’s call the election and bring back pride and integrity to this nation. God forbid you all vote Justin back in. God forbid.

ON BABY

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By Dale Jodoin In the world's big problem with drugs like crack, meth, and heroin, there's a sad story that doesn't get told much. It's about the smallest victims, babies, who are born into a life of struggle because their moms were caught in the grip of addiction. Back in the '70s, hospitals were filled with the cries of babies who, right from birth, were fighting against the drugs they were exposed to in their mom's womb. These babies couldn’t stop crying because they were feeling the harsh pain of withdrawal. Fast forward to today, and sadly, this is still happening. More babies are being born facing this tough battle, and it doesn't seem to be getting better. People are trying to fix the drug problem by giving addicts clean needles and safe places to use drugs, aiming to reduce harm. But what about these tiny babies? They start life in a really tough spot, craving drugs they never chose to take. How do you help a newborn baby who’s suffering like this? Statistics show how big this problem is. For example, in the United States, the number of babies born withdrawing from drugs, a condition called neonatal abstinence syndrome (NAS), went up a lot between 2000 and 2012. This means thousands of babies start life in pain each year because of drug addiction. These little ones don’t just cry more; they have a hard start in life that can affect them forever. They didn’t choose this, and it's not fair. They are paying the price for a problem they had no part in creating. We often talk about helping drug addicts but forget about these babies. They and their moms need our help too. It's not just about today's drug problem. If we don’t do something, the next generation will suffer too. These babies grow up, and their rough start can lead to more problems later in life. This sad situation should make us think and want to do something. If you see a pregnant woman struggling with addiction, it's a chance to help not just her but also her baby. We need to push for more support for these women and their children. They need care, love, and help to break free from the cycle of addiction. In the end, while there are no easy answers, we must try harder to help these innocent babies. They deserve a chance at a better life, free from the pain and problems of drugs. Let’s not forget about them. They need us to speak up and help make a change.

An Assignment: The New Norm for Job Applicants. Why?

By Nick Kossovan Many job seekers spend their time and energy focusing on job searching factors beyond their control, namely how an employer designed their hiring process. Regular readers of this column know I stress the truism that employers own their hiring process, not the job seeker. Hence, rather than criticizing an employer's hiring process, job seekers should work with it. Criticism or wishful thinking won't get you hired. The latest complaint: Employers are increasingly asking candidates to complete an assignment. This ask isn't new. Early in my career, I applied for a technical writer position to write instruction manuals for the employer's line of software. After the initial interview, I was asked to write instructions, following the company's internal style guide, consisting of a maximum of eight steps on anything. (e.g., a recipe, changing a tire, repotting a plant) The employer's ask made sense. They wanted to evaluate my methodical thought process and ability to write comprehensive instructions. I gladly did the assignment. (No, I didn't get the job.) There's obvious merit in asking candidates vying for a position that involves writing, delivering presentations, or analyzing data to complete an assignment. However, candidates are increasingly being asked to complete an assignment for a broader range of jobs; why? Answer: In recent years, there's been an uptick in the number of fraudulent candidates populating the job market. A recent Forbes article headline: 70% Of Workers Lie On Resumes, New Study Shows. Consider what 70% means from the hiring manager's perspective. Essentially, 70% indicates the likelihood that the candidate the hiring manager is interviewing is likely to be lying or exaggerating about some aspect of their background. Hence, understandably, employers are taking longer to hire due to their increased diligence in weeding out fraudulent candidates. There are many reasons a person lies on their resume. The most common, in my opinion: 1. Desperate need of a job. 2. Believe they'll get away with their lies. 3. Too lazy to do the work to obtain the required education, skills and experience, and 4. Feel entitled to "success shortcuts.” There's no justifiable reason to lie on your resume, LinkedIn profile, or at any time throughout an employer's hiring process. However, as the Forbes article points out, many people's moral compass tells them it's okay to lie to employers; thus, lying on resumes, and it can be assumed LinkedIn profiles, is common. Sadly, this practice of lying is detrimental to job seekers who present honest and transparent resumes. They're competing against fraudulent candidates who, unjust as the reality is, have a greater chance of being selected for an interview because their lies and exaggerations make them more appealing. Employers are catching on that the [insert position] they hired several months ago, who regurgitated current buzzwords, exhibited just the right amount of boastfulness, just south of being arrogant, and bragged of past successes, implying they'd do the same for the employer, was all talk. As a result of such bad hires, employers are increasingly asking candidates to complete an assignment. Employers understand an assignment isn't foolproof due diligence. The candidate can still use AI, seek help from friends, submit someone else's work, etc. Even so, requiring candidates to complete an assignment as a due diligence step is better than nothing. After empathizing with the reason(s) why an employer makes completing an assignment part of their hiring process, the question becomes: Should you spend unpaid time doing the assignment? The argument that candidates are exploited by not being paid for their time is mute since the assignment is voluntary. Additionally, I've yet to be presented with solid evidence that employers are using work created by candidates. Obviously, there's no definitive yes or no answer other than you should only do an assignment if you see it as an opportunity to demonstrate your capabilities. To be competitive with other candidates doing the same assignment, you must give 100%. One time, I had a candidate offer to do an assignment. She strategically created an opportunity to demonstrate her skills by offering to analyze and write a recommendation report based on six months' data. Impressed by her proactiveness, I took her up on her offer and ended up hiring her. (This is how you compete in today's job market.) An assignment allows the employer to assess a candidate in four ways: 1. Are they the real deal? 2. Are they genuinely interested in the position? 3. How will they tailor projects to support their brand? 4. Work ethic: Are they fully committed to tasks, or just do the minimum? When you accept an assignment, make sure you: 1. Understand the purpose of the assignment and what skills are being evaluated. 2. Know the deadline, format, length, and mediums you can use. (Don't assume!) 3. You own your work. Don't view being asked to do an assignment as a dichotomy between your feelings about the employer's request and you wanting the job. The yin-yang is simple: Either you want the job or don't. Either you respect the employer's right to design their hiring processes as they see fit, or you don't. Because job seekers don't control the hiring process, no grey area exists. _____________________________________________________________________ Nick Kossovan, a well-seasoned veteran of the corporate landscape, offers advice on searching for a job. You can send him your questions at artoffindingwork@gmail.com

BY A NOSE

By A Nose from Wayne & Tamara My behavior and emotions make no sense to me. I have a wonderful boyfriend. At first I admit I was not fully attracted to him. At the time I was hung up on dating gorgeous men that in the end brought me nothing but a pretty face. But the more time I spent with my boyfriend, the more I realized how compatible we are. My friends and family love him. We are a great couple and share similar views on life. We laugh together and play together. He is ambitious, mature, and so sweet you can see the goodness in his heart by his eyes. In bed we have amazing chemistry. He is sensual and gentle, which is what I love and have at last found. One thing perplexes me: I cannot accept his large and long nose. I know it sounds crazy. This one imperfection of his keeps me from fully saying yes and concluding he is the perfect guy for me to marry. I've told him this, and he mostly laughs it off. He even makes fun of his own nose. I used to have a long nose myself, but not anymore. Could this be the insecurities I felt as an unattractive child? When I am with him, I am fully in love and forget about his nose. When he is gone, all these nagging doubts begin. Joyce Joyce, there are two versions of the Cyrano de Bergerac story: the original play by Edmond Rostand, and the movie version starring Steve Martin. In both stories, Cyrano fears rejection by the woman he loves because of his large nose. Rostand's play ends unhappily, but Martin's movie shows love triumphant. Unlike the Cyrano story, your boyfriend's nose is not a problem for him. It is a problem for you. You are doing to him what was done to you as a child. Others made you feel unattractive, and that is how you feel about him. Is being with him like wearing an ugly sweater? Do you obsess about what your children wouldlook like? We are not judging you based on this aspect of your personality, but you haven't met someone you love so much that the outside package doesn't matter. Love causes us to see the world through different eyes. Until that happens, your relationships may resemble the Rostand story, not Steve Martin's. Tamara Eight Million Stories I recently married. Prior to getting serious, I told my husband about my not so spotless past, giving him the opportunity to bow out. He said my past didn't matter. He didn't, however, return the favor. After we married, the official who denied his driver's license reinstatement told me he has not one, but seven alcohol related arrests. My husband vehemently denies he has a substance abuse problem, but he took 120 pain pills in a week's time. See a pattern? He accuses me of infidelity, which is impossible because he hardly ever lets me out of his sight. He's gone so far as to accuse me of poisoning our dog against him. To top off everything else, despite my parents helping us pay the bills, he recently bought a weekend at a time-share resort. I feel I've been fighting single-handedly for our marriage. Will this man ever live in reality? Mia Mia, the crime show "Naked City" ended each episode with the same tag line: "There are eight million stories in the Naked City. This has been one of them." Most of the shows ended on a melancholy note with people wishing things hadn't happened as they did. Your husband committed a crime against you: fraud. He was impersonating someone you could love. At the end of each "Naked City" episode, people dealt with the aftermath of what was done to them and moved on with their lives. Like everyone else in the Naked City, you should, too. Wayne SEND LETTERS TO: Directanswers@WayneAndTamara.com Wayne & Tamara are the authors of Cheating in a Nutshell and The Young Woman’s Guide to Older Men—available from Amazon, Apple, and booksellers everywhere.

MENOPAUSE

from Menopause? By W. Gifford-Jones MD and Diana Gifford There’s a universal fact for women. If they live long enough, their capacity to bring forth children will end, and they will become menopausal. Menopause can be when the thermostat becomes their most prized possession. But not all women have hot flashes. Some go through this period wondering why they have no symptoms. The best advice for them is, “Enjoy the smooth sailing!” Other women endure needless suffering. There are treatments, and these women should see their doctors. The medical journal, The Lancet, has urged women to become educated about hormone replacement therapy (HRT). Menopause should not be considered a disease. It is a natural process. Be cautious with commercial interests of pharmaceutical companies’ propaganda. Seek information from a medical specialist. The authors of the Lancet report stress they are not opposed to HRT as it can be effective in treating hot flashes, vaginal dryness, and genital urinary symptoms. Many years ago, HRT was often used by women to control menopausal symptoms. The standard treatment involved the hormones estrogen and progestin, a synthetic form of progesterone. But a large and widely publicised study called the Women’s Health Initiative identified problems with HRT. Doctors and patients concluded HRT was dangerous and this misconception lingers today. The study had significant shortcomings however, and subsequent studies have more nuanced conclusions. For women under 60, or for those less than a decade out of menopause, the benefits of HRT in fighting debilitating symptoms outweighed the risk. There was one other caution. Those using HRT should not have a family history of stroke, breast cancer, or coronary heart disease. Which women suffer the most from menopause? It’s those who are affected by severe symptoms. Imagine a stalwart high school principal. She has handled the tough job for years. But with the onset of menopause, the slighted provocation has her bursting into tears behind closed doors. For the first time, she feels incapable of the task. If she meets the criteria mentioned above, then she is a textbook case for HRT. Within a week, her problem would be history. Menopause is not just one event or one symptom, such as hot flashes. A gradual decrease in the production of estrogen influences organs such as the vagina and urinary bladder. It’s these organs that women are loath to discuss with their family doctor, to say nothing of their partners. It may come as a shock to younger people to know that seniors have sexual relations. But menopause can make vaginal tissues thinner and more easily irritated. Past columns have tried to explain this with a touch of eloquence, noting that it’s hard for females to sing with a sore throat. Put plainly, it’s hard for menopausal and post-menopausal women to enjoy sex with an inflamed vagina (atrophic vaginitis). Sometimes neither the woman nor her partner knows what’s causing the severe pain. Unfortunately, many women suffer silently. Those who ask for help will find there are good remedies. Something as simple as an estrogen cream can resolve an irritated vagina within two weeks. Other consequences of menopause, like the accelerated loss of bone density, may also be treated with HRT. Sometimes problems are missed because a vaginal examination is not done during a check up. Or patients don’t mention issues to the doctor. The comedian, Joan Rivers, made a joke about news that having a dog makes you ten years younger. “My first thought was to rescue two more,” she said, before adding, “but I don’t want to go through menopause again.” Today, women can and should get their symptoms treated. Sign-up at www.docgiff.com to receive our weekly e-newsletter. For comments, contact-us@docgiff.com. Follow us Instagram @docgiff and @diana_gifford_jones

Political suppression is a dirty game

By Lisa Robinson - Pickering City Councillor In a democratic society, the suppression of opposing political views is not only immature but it undermines the principles of democracy. We see it more and more each day how politicians are using their power to silence dissenting voices and manipulate certain narratives. Persistently engaging in a game of dirty politics, eroding the integrity of the democratic process. The longer we allow this dirty game to continue, the more we risk creating an authoritarian environment, that stifles open dialogue and debate which is your right as a Canadian. By now we have all witnessed politicians, at all levels of government who are so driven by their desire to maintain control, resort to abusing their power by taking fellow politicians with opposing views to the integrity commissioner or other authorities. This manipulative tactic aims to silence critics through sanctions and penalties, wasting taxpayers' money in the process. Such actions divert resources from addressing pressing issues that affect the public, highlighting a disregard for the responsibilities entrusted to them. Politicians who engage in suppressing opposing views often resort to manipulating words and context to control the narrative. They selectively highlight certain statements while ignoring the broader context, aiming to discredit their opponents and their character. This manipulation of information not only distorts the truth but also creates a false narrative that serves their own interests. Such immature tactics undermine the transparency and honesty that are vital to a functioning democracy. By suppressing opposing views, politicians undermine the democratic process itself. Democracy thrives on the exchange of ideas, open debates, and the active participation of citizens. When politicians silence dissenting voices, they limit the diversity of perspectives necessary for informed decision-making. This erosion of democratic values weakens the trust of the electorate and damages the very foundation of a democratic society. Citizens vote for politicians based on their promises to represent their interests and concerns. When politicians use their power to silence dissent, they disregard the voices of those who elected them. This breach of trust is nothing short of betrayal to the electorate and erodes the democratic legitimacy of elected officials. Fostering disillusionment among the public. When politicians resort to suppressing opposing views, they create a culture of fear and intimidation. This not only hinders the free expression of ideas but also discourages individuals from participating in the political process. A healthy democracy relies on active civic engagement, where citizens feel safe to voice their opinions and contribute to the decision-making process. It is crucial to hold politicians accountable for their actions, demand transparency, and promote an open and inclusive political debate. True leaders understand the value of open honest dialogue and debate. They have the skills to participate in and open themselves up to the power of constructive criticism. So for all those Politicians who are not mature enough to play nice on the political chessboard, may I suggest you move over and let someone else show you how to play the game with honesty and integrity. Everyone deserves the right to be heard. "Strength Does Not Lie In The Absence Of Fear, But In The Courage To Face It Head-On And Rise Above It"

FERRARI MASERATI PISSASHITY

By Joe Ingino Editor/Publisher ACCOMPLISHED WRITER/AUTHOR OF OVER 800,000 Published Columns in Canada and The United States “I live a dream in a nightmare world” Always Remember That The cosmic blueprint of your life was written in code across the sky at the moment you were born. Decode Your Life By Living It Without Regret or Sorrow. - ONE DAY AT A TIME - I say Bravo to all those that can afford a Ferrari. They are the ones that can drive fast but like to take it nice and slow and smooth... as to almost showboat their lifestyle. I say Bravo to all those that can afford to drive a Maserati. The ultimate in class and elegance. I say Bravo to all the salesmen that had the talent to sell want to be Ferrari, Maserati drivers a Honda, Hyundai, Toyota calling them sports cars.... Or in my new high performance category called ‘The Pissashity’s’. Pissashity’s are the ones that pass you on the highway at the speed of light. Inches from your vehicle as if playing some sort of video game were human life is not a factor. I don’t know about you. But, the 401 has become a death grind. Almost every other day there seems to be a fatal accident. As a driver on the highway, I can tell you that various factors contribute to the horrific accidents. Without notice the Pissashity drivers. You can tell that most of the Pissashity’s are young punks with little or no real driving experience. Champs on the computer in the make believe world of Grand Theft Auto. An arena that has the user crashing into all kinds of obstacles only to re-warp back to life a few seconds later. Very entertaining but very different in real life. I remember one evening coming back to Oshawa. These two Pissashity’s flew past me. Weaving in and out of lanes and passing people as if cars were parked. Not to long after they passed. I heard a loud bang and smoke. Well surely enough. The Pissashity’s were scrap metal. A horrible accident including various cars and a truck. People do not realize. Sport cars handle differently. They are design for particular high performance driving. Pissashity's are just average cars painted a sporty color. Some with modified suspensions and exhaust. At the end of the day. A Pissashity is a Pissashity. You can’t expect a real sport car with high performance suspension and 19 inch wheels to perform the same as an off the assembly block suspension with 14 - 17 all seasons. The other huge difference is power. Going fast does not mean your pissashity become a sport car or that it will handle like one. I remember the driving culture shock. When I was young I had purchased my first 300ZX twin Turbo. One of the first to come off the assembly line. I remember I had to take a course on how to drive it. A course that prepared you for all kinds of conditions and weather. Much like Porsche offers to some drivers. This was an eye opener. Going from a rusted out 1978 Buick Biscane to a brand new 300ZX. My Buick went fast and if it could talk I be doing 10 - 20 at Kingston Pen. Pissashity drivers. Please, slow down. You are putting your life and those around you in danger. Remember some day you may own a Ferrari, Maserati. For the mean time enjoy the Pissashitty in the middle lane like everyone else and for god sake signal when changing lanes.

Party Politics in Canada

by Maj (ret'd) CORNELIU. CHISU, CD, PMSC, FEC, CET, P. Eng. Former Member of Parliament Pickering-Scarborough East We are entering the initial phase of a potential federal election that can technically be called at any time, but will most likely be held in the Fall of 2025. As such, the battle for nominations is already starting, with the political parties establishing their own criteria for selection of candidates, but in line with Elections Canada rules. Such battles are not without controversies, especially in the Conservative Party of Canada, which has a commanding lead in the polls at this time. It is tempting for many nomination candidates to come forward in the hope of being elected to the House of Commons. The results of a recent by-election in the riding of Durham confirmed the fact that the Conservative Party of Canada is doing well under the leadership of Pierre Poilievre. Conservative candidate Jamil Jivani, a lawyer and commentator, secured over 57 per cent of the votes in the riding of Durham, previously held by the former leader of the party, Erin O’Toole. Though the riding of Durham is a Conservative stronghold, in this by-election, it registered one of the largest margins of victory the Tories have had in the riding in the past 20 years. Jivani’s success comes as the Tories continue to surge in the polls, ahead of the governing Liberal party, pushing a message that promises to "axe the tax, build the homes, fix the budget and stop the crime." In general, by-elections are low-turnout referenda on the government’s popularity and this was, after all, a Conservative seat. Yet the historically-high margin of victory seems to confirm all the recent polls foreshadowing a Poilievre majority in the making. However, there is a danger, that the Conservatives might be passing their best-before moment for sending the Liberals back to a well-deserved term in Official Opposition, if not a return to third-party status. In politics, things can change rapidly and mistakes can be costly. Despite chronic Liberal efforts to render themselves unelectable by rolling out gaffe after gaffe over boondoggles galore while enduring global humiliation amid a carnage of fiscal ineptitude, there is a chance the seemingly inevitable Conservative victory is not yet cast in stone. The liberals having negotiated a pharma care package with the NDP, the Liberals should be able to retain power until the scheduled vote in October 2025 - and that is a long time for the Conservatives to hold a commanding lead. So far, it is easy for Poilievre to merely oppose everything, particularly this liberal government, but the need to propose a future Conservative course in government is where the rocks lie for his breezy sail to victory. Complicating Poilievre’s drift toward a destiny as prime minister is the risk that NDP support collapses and drifts Liberal. This could happen as nervous voters strategically aim to prevent the Conservatives from winning so big that they preside over a one-party Parliament with token opposition. There are obviously other challenges to be faced and one of them is the selection of good candidates. Here challenges are already arising in the form of complicated backroom dealings. If not handled properly, these will put the Conservative Party’s aspirations for power in grave danger. Recent examples are not encouraging in this regard. One example is Arpan Khanna, a lawyer and former staffer of Jason Kenney who served as the Ontario co-chair for Pierre Poilievre's successful leadership bid. He subsequently became the national outreach chair for the Conservative Party. He then ran for the Conservative Nomination for the Riding of Oxford to succeed my former colleague, then-Member of Parliament Dave Mackenize. In February 2023, MacKenzie criticized Khanna for promoting a quote implying that Conservative leader, Pierre Poilievre endorsed him for the nomination and the party was supporting Khanna's candidacy. Mackenzie believed it a violation of the party nomination rules based on the Conservative code of conduct. Anyway, on June 19, 2023 Khanna was elected MP in the riding. After the race, Conservative operatives accused the Liberals of racism for emphasizing their candidate’s local ties to the riding, in contrast to Khanna being an outsider. This is not an example of a fair and unbiased procedures for nominating candidates. Another example of this type of questionable behavior occured recently in the riding of Pickering Uxbridge. A young candidate for nomination with good credentials, who worked very hard within the party’s prescribed guidelines for potential candidates, was thrown under the bus by the party establishment, exercising quasi-dictatorial powers. They probably have someone else in mind for the riding, but that does not justify stripping a worthy potential contender of his rights. Should this kind of behavior continue, there is a danger that many people will become estranged from the Conservative Party, reducing their chances of becoming the governing party. It is imperative that the leader, Pierre Poilievre, be aware of this situation and intervene. Pierre Poilievre as the prime minister in waiting will have his performance judged more on clear answers than question period, and his plan for the future of Canada will be carefully scrutinized. 18 months (the likely time to the next election) is a very long time in politics. From the current high in the polls, the Conservative road to victory will start to get rougher and rougher. They need to aware, and beware of pitfalls.

PLEASE LIBERATE US

By Rosaldo Russo Allow me to begin this column by thanking the Oshawa/Central newspaper for allowing me the opportunity and access to the press. Not to many if any allow an average person like me to tell the world what I see and think. In my opinion. The Editor/Publisher is a real upstanding type of guy. He shoots from the hip and hold traditional core values. My name is Rosaldo Russo. I came to this great country to make a better life for myself and my family. I thank Canada for everything it has allowed me to do and earn. I worked construction all my life. I know the value of hard work and honesty. I remember as a boy my father always telling me to work hard and buy land. So I did. I remember days when I did not have enough to eat. I go to work... but I did not wait for hand outs. I rounded up my pride my skill and my determination to succeed and went to work. In those days the only benefits we received was the fact we were employed. Before retiring I was the owner and operator of local material supply company that allowed me to retired without worry. Now that I have time to enjoy life. I look around me and have some concern for future generations. I see that the world is finished. No matter the municipality the same putrid mentality seems to have infected them. Oshawa has to be the worst. You call. You get to no one. Or get the wrong person. Or worst, leave a message. One question that keep poping in my mind. Is the quality of life any better or worst than it was four years ago. It is obvious that it is worst. You have this idiot of Carter running around lieying to people on what great progress. What progress. He is allowing developers to rape our farm land. Wonder how much kick back he is getting. Well, the voters got what they deserved. You vote in a former crack head. You get what you paid for. One would have thought that he would clean up the core. Deal with the homeless. What has this pretty boy wanna be Justin did. Nothing. I hope that all that today voted for him and are suffering remember this... And next time don’t be such a jackass and make the same mistake again. Out of all council only one person was replaced. What a disgrace. Now we are facing a federal election. Pick Justin. Same old same old. Pick Conservatives... new same old same old just different flagship. Canadian politics are finished. It is not the ideology but the putrid culture of money and greed. We need a good leader in Canada....

Oh Canada...do we stand on guard for thee?

By Dale Jodoin The Canadian Armed Forces (CAF) are at a critical juncture, facing recruitment and retention challenges amidst economic strains and shifting societal perceptions. These challenges are particularly pronounced in the context of how young Canadians of European descent perceive their place within the nation and its military, influenced by educational narratives and societal messages. Economic Strains and the Call for Fair Support The CAF's operational readiness is impacted by economic challenges, including underfunding and the rising cost of living, which have made it difficult for service members to support their families. Addressing these economic challenges is crucial for improving morale and retention within the ranks. The Impact of Societal and Educational Narratives A significant concern has emerged regarding the narratives young Canadians of European descent encounter from kindergarten through high school. Reports suggest that these narratives often focus on historical injustices in a manner that leads to feelings of self-reproach. When combined with similar messages from media and governmental sources, there is a growing sense that these young individuals are being taught to view their heritage in a solely negative light. This perception of being encouraged to "hate themselves" for their background can have profound implications. By the time they reach an age where military service becomes an option, the question arises: why should they commit to defending a country they feel has turned its back on them? Addressing Historical Contexts Without Alienation It is crucial to acknowledge that Canadians of European descent today have not participated in historical injustices and should not bear the weight of collective guilt for actions taken in the past. Educational and societal narratives need to evolve to recognize the contributions and worth of all Canadians, fostering a sense of pride and unity rather than division. A balanced approach to history—one that educates on past mistakes while also celebrating achievements and contributions from all communities—can help build a more inclusive national identity. This approach would encourage young Canadians of European descent to feel valued and respected, reinforcing their place within the fabric of Canadian society and its future. Moving Forward: Inclusivity, Understanding, and National Unity To overcome the challenges facing the CAF and Canadian society, a comprehensive strategy is needed. This strategy should include economic measures to ensure the military is well-funded and its members are fairly compensated. Operationally, the CAF must continue to prioritize transparency, accountability, and reform. On a societal level, there is a pressing need to revisit educational and public narratives to promote a more inclusive understanding of Canada's history and identity. By doing so, Canada can foster a sense of belonging and commitment among all potential recruits, including those who may have felt marginalized by prevailing narratives. The path forward for the Canadian Armed Forces and Canadian society involves embracing a narrative of unity and inclusivity. By addressing the concerns of young Canadians of European descent and ensuring that educational narratives foster a positive sense of identity and belonging, Canada can build a stronger, more unified future. This approach will not only aid in overcoming recruitment challenges but also ensure that the CAF remains a diverse and effective force, representative of the nation it serves.

Conflict In Faith

from Wayne & Tamara My husband is Jewish, and I am Catholic. That wasn't a problem when we were dating, because he isn't religious. He married a Catholic before, and their daughter was raised Catholic. A reformed rabbi married us. I sacrificed being married in church by a priest, but we shared our traditions. My husband broke the glass, and we lit our candles. My family wasn't too happy I married outside my faith, but they accept him. When our daughter was born, I didn't want my children growing up with no direction, so I decided to raise her Catholic. My husband wasn't too happy, but he agreed. His family was invited to the christening, but they refused to have any part of it. I bit my tongue and let it go, but I resented them for not being there. Four years later we have a son, and it's his turn to be baptized. This time they come to the party, not the church, and they don't bring a gift. So that's another slap in the face. Two months ago our daughter had her first communion. I asked if they wanted to be part of their granddaughter's day, and they said no. So to me that's another slap in the face. Through the years we celebrated my husband's holidays with his family, and my family went to their bar mitzvahs. My husband agrees with his family that it's okay for them not to be involved, but I know for a fact his family has gone to christenings, communions, and confirmations for their neighbors. Well, after 10 years, I no longer want to be involved in their holidays and family functions. In three years’ time, when it's my son's turn, I know they'll do the same thing. My husband is in the middle, which I know is hard for him, but I can't bite my tongue anymore. I want to know how to stop hating my husband's family. Alyssa Alyssa, what if you kept inviting vegetarians to an all-you-can-eat steak tartare dinner? (That's seasoned raw beef.) Would you really expect them to attend? You knew when you married there was a divide. Your in-laws are of a different faith, and different faiths oppose and contradict one another. If you don't have a problem going to their religious events, then go. But don't expect or invite them to yours. They find them indigestible. When you were married by a rabbi, you suggested things might work out otherwise. All your in-laws are doing by not coming or giving a gift is affirming "this is not what we want." When Wayne was in the navy, the rule in the wardroom was no one was allowed to discuss politics or religion. Perhaps you and your in-laws can put religion in the category of topics which are off-limits. How much healing might be possible between you in just leaving religion out of your relationship? Tamara

The Right Food

the Right Food By W. Gifford-Jones MD and Diana Gifford It was 200 years ago that Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin, a French lawyer and culinary writer, first wrote “Tell me what you eat and I will tell you what you are.” It’s a simple and enduring message. But people are not being watchful of what they eat, and it is having far-reaching consequences, not just around the middle. Like other organs, the eyes are affected by diet. Many research teams have shown that a poor diet increases the risk of age-related macular degeneration (AMD) of the eye. Today AMD is the leading cause of severe vision loss for those over the age of 65. By 75 one in three North Americans have early signs of AMD. A command given to American soldiers at the Battle of Bunker Hill was, “Don’t fire until you see the whites of their eyes.” But if these soldiers suffered from age-related macular degeneration, they would not have fired a single shot. AMD destroys the macular, a tiny spot at the back of the eye known as the retina that’s responsible for central vision. Without central vison it’s impossible to drive a car or see grandchildren clearly. It robs people of their independence, and often leads to depression. In one study. researchers fed mice a low glycemic diet which is rich in slowly digested carbohydrates (whole natural grains). Another group of mice were given a diet high in rapidly digested carbohydrates (refined processed grains). They discovered the mice on the slowly digested carbohydrates developed fewer retinal changes. More surprising was that switching mice from a high to slowly digested carbohydrates diet appeared to stop retinal damage. Why the difference? A high glycemic diet, speedily absorbed, causes frequent spikes in blood sugar. The unhealthy consequences can lead to Type 2 diabetes. The human gut contains a variety of bacteria, some being helpful and others harmful. How they act depends on whether the glycemic index is low or high. These microorganisms produce chemical substances known as metabolites. Low quality diets produce metabolites that cause harm to the retina and increase the risk of AMD. There are two types of AMD. The dry type affects about 90 percent of sufferers in which small yellow deposits cause dryness of the macula. The wet type, the more serious, occurs when abnormal blood vessels grow under the macula, distorting and affecting central vision. What can you do to decrease the risk AMD? See an ophthalmologist at age 65 or sooner, then every two years to detect any visual changes. The key message is to take a good look at the food on your plate, and remember “you are what you eat”. For many decades, we have been eating more refined flour, devoid of vitamins and minerals, many packaged foods and too much sugar. What we need is more whole wheat, fruits, leafy vegetables, nuts and seeds. Our dietary failure has triggered an epidemic of obesity, Type 2 diabetes, cardiovascular disease and now macular degeneration. Years ago, infection killed people in the prime of life. Now it’s degenerative diseases. But there’s a big difference. Infectious disease killed quickly. Degenerative ones cause a slow painful way to the grave. Learn more about the glycemic index and the hazards of high blood sugar. Diet is key, and if you want more guidance, stop into a natural health store where experts can point you to supplements that help with glycemic control. Never forget the Gifford-Jones Law that states one bad problem leads to another and another. Poor diet leads to obesity, diabetes, heart attack, and now macular degeneration. Will we ever learn? Sign-up at www.docgiff.com to receive our weekly e-newsletter. For comments, contact-us@docgiff.com. Follow us Instagram @docgiff and @diana_gifford_jones

The Frog Boiling Method

By Lisa Robinson - Pickering City Councillor Many people in today’s society seem to struggle when confronted with the truth and this struggle my friends is very real. In my own personal experiences, I have had to confront my demons and struggles to gain a deeper understanding of the truth. The whole process was not only intimidating and unsettling at times, but downright frightening and eye-opening, as it forced me to confront uncomfortable truths of what is happening in the world today, and at the same time face my own vulnerabilities. I keep going back to that famous courtroom scene in “A Few Good Men” (1992) where Jack Nicholson, played the character of Colonel Nathan R. Jessup and the very moment he was pushed so hard that he yelled out the iconic quote, “You can’t handle the truth” Once one can understand how if you can open yourself up to this kind of a pivotal moment you will start to not only see what everyone else see’s, but you will be able to use critical thinking skills and start to think differently. If one would only take the time and allow themselves to realize that perhaps not everything we see or hear that is being pushed on us by celebrities, news media, institutions, governments, and nongovernmental institutions to name a few, is truth, you too may have a transformative experience that allows you to see the truth in a new light, bringing a profound shift in your thinking and understanding. Instead of facing the truth head-on, some choose to blindly conform and follow along. I personally link this type of behaviour to the “Frog boiling method” where gradual changes go unnoticed until it is too late. For those who may be unfamiliar with this metaphor, it is about a frog sitting in a cool pot of water thinking everything is ok. As the heat gradually increases the frog does not take notice until it is too late and he is being cooked in a pot of boiling water. This metaphor highlights the dangers of complacency and the importance of using critical thinking skills to become aware of subtle changes in our surroundings and circumstances. One should always seek to educate themselves by adopting a behaviour in which to also seek alternate sources of information not only to consider different viewpoints but to weigh evidence and form a well-rounded opinion based on a more comprehensive understanding of the topic at large. Rather than taking the time to listen to what others have to say and participating in open honest dialog or debate, some individuals are quick to jump in that cool pot of water filled with criticism, insult, name calling, and labeling one as being a bigot, racist, transphobe, without taking a critical well needed moment to research or participate to see what is the truth. Calling one a conspiracy theorist or deeming the information as misinformation without truly understanding the intentions of the speaker has become an alarming trend driven by the desire to push personal agendas and discredit others. It has also become more and more concerning to observe people in today’s society, attacking people far beyond mere name-calling to targeting individual's jobs and livelihood’s, in an attempt to make them suffer simply because of a divergence in values or opinions. The fact that some individuals would display such vindictiveness and turn against their fellow human beings for holding opposing views is truly a character trait that shows they lack having moral principles of determining the difference between right and wrong, good and bad. We all have demons, and it’s time to start looking in the mirror and confronting those demons head-on. This self-reflection will be frightening at times, but once you start to pull back the curtain, you may realize that not everything is how it seems. It can be hard to come to terms that the institutions, governments, media, and celebrities that we have religiously relied upon for years, may have deliberately deceived or misled us. Time to get out of the pot and do your own research. Once you do this, I promise you that your life will evolve as you will then be able to treat those with opposing views with honesty, fairness, integrity, compassion, and respect that they deserve. Remember the Golden Rule: “Do onto others as you would have them do unto you” Then you will no longer choose to participate in these petty games of hate and vindictiveness but will learn to agree to disagree. My doors always open if you need help in your journey of seeking the truth. “Speaking the truth can be a challenging path, for it unveils the raw realities that some may find uncomfortable. Yet remember that those who react with hate or choose to bully are merely seeking solace in their ignorance. Stay steadfast, for your words have the power to inspire change, even if it takes time for others to truly listen” Lisa Robinson 2023 "Strength Does Not Lie In The Absence Of Fear, But In The Courage To Face It Head-On And Rise Above It"

“Canada, Your Silence is Giving Away Your Rights”

by D. Lynne Associate Columnist Everyone likes Canadians. Why, because Canadians are the politest, the nicest, the most accepting people in the world. For the most part we Canadians are a live land let live society. If we don’t like or agree with something most of us will mumble, grumble, complain with our friends and then go on about our business, doing nothing. In other words. We tend to go silent. Why do we go so silent when we know right from wrong? Is it because we are afraid? Why do we not stand up for what is right? Is it because we don’t have the time, or maybe we’re to busy, or we want others to solve the problems or are we just plain afraid of being centered out, of being accused of being racist, homophobic etc. etc. This is how the bullies, the abusers get their way. They immediately gaslight us, which is a form of Psychological Manipulation which abusers use to attempt to sow self-doubt and confusion in their victim’s mind. An example of gaslighting is domestic violence, where the victim, usually a woman, is afraid to seek help as she has been lead to belief by her abuser, that everything that happens is all her fault. When a few people do join together to step up and peacefully protest what’s happening the bullies and abusers show up in large numbers, many of who may also be paid to hide beneath masks and dark clothing and insight physical harm. An example of this is when parents and others joined together, in the fall of 2023, to peacefully protest what they believe to be the sexual indoctrination of their young children, unions sent out a urgent call for unions and members etc to come out early and in numbers to block and yell, screaming hate etc at the peaceful protesters. This is only one example of what is happening all across Canada. School Boards in Ontario and across Canada are refusing to hear parents concerns and have been stopping meetings, having security and sometime police remove the parents from the meeting and then continuing on with the meeting. School Trustees that stand up for the parents are being censured and banned from meetings etc. And why is this happening? ~ They do it to gain power and control over the people. Is it possible that this is al just one step of the Bigger Plan, part of the Great Reset? Think about it, the following by themselves don’t seem like a big deal but put them all togther ; ~ No fossil fuels ~ No Gas Stoves ~ No gas vehicles ~ Electric Vehicles ~ Methane Gas - Cows ~ Facial Recognition ~ Digital Money / cashless ~ Digital I.D.s ~ Carbon Tax ~ Climate Crisis / CO2 ~ Trees / CO2 ~ Geo Engineering / Chem trails ~ Bike / Scooter Rentals ~ 15 minute cities” aka “Smart Cities” ~ Gender Classification ~ Destroy Women ~ Sexual Education of Children ~ Etc. etc. etc. Hmmm ... when all these goals and are accomplished and you are living in their 15 minute/Smart Cities, will you be restricted to these areas and not allowed to leave without permission, after all you will have everything you need within 15 minutes of where you live, no need for a car no need to go anywhere.. Is it fiction, maybe, maybe not. Are we victims of gaslighting? We all know when we were told to stay home, cut carbon usage, the elite, those in power & politics, the heads of corporations etc. all enjoyed the freedom and the luxury of their jets and lifestyle to live while we were coerced into staying home and doing without. Maybe it’s time to stop being silent of being afraid. Don’t be a gaslight victim. Many of your friends and neighbours feel the same as you. Remember everything starts with that first step Stop the Silence ~ Start the Conversation ~ Stand up for what is Right As the song says “Children are Our Future” make sure they have one

2024 Transit Service Plan- Service Enhancements Moving Forward

By Maurice Brenner Regional Councillor Ward 1 Pickering As 2024 rolled in, DRT riders experienced significant impacts across all Municipalities as a result of changes to a number of local routes. Why was this happening? DRT like all Regional departments set a service plan projecting a 5% increase over 2023, to meet Budget guidelines set by Regional Council. With growing competition of priorities such as the modernization of Durham Regional Police Services along with increasing pressures on Social Services and Housing caused by a lack of funding and affordability, DRT was required to reduce the 5% target to 2% and subsequently to 1.6% What was the route cause of the funding shortfall? All Municipalities along with the Association of Municipalities for Ontario (AMO) felt the impact of the Province of Ontario’s Bill 23 (More Homes Faster Act). Growth was no longer paying for growth and Municipalities were faced with 2 options to either transfer the burden to existing tax payers which would increase the economic hardship, or adjust service levels to minimize the economic impact. What does the 2024 DRT Service Plan look like and how will it adhere to the DRT Executive Committee Recommendation to provide costing to address the January 2024 Changes? The proposed 2024 DRT service plan and Budget of $474.2 million supports continued service enhancements, investments in growth infrastructure and fleet electrification, maintaining core service requirements and assets, actively engaging customers and stakeholders, and building an organizational framework to sustain DRT during a period of unprecedented growth, service modernization, and innovation. The proposed budget also includes several key initiatives including restoring some of the impacts from the January 2024 changes; The proposed service plan and Budget provides for up to 569,876 hours of annual scheduled revenue service and 174,692 hours of On Demand revenue service. As a result of the service model transition, this is the first year that DRT is reporting separate revenue service hours for scheduled and On Demand. The 2024 service plan includes an increase of 59,665 hours above the adjusted 2023 base service hours at an estimated net cost of $5.9 million and will provide for: • select resumption of service suspended in January within Ajax, Whitby, and Clarington that was reallocated in January to address growth demands across the system. This will provide service to areas of furthest distance to a transit stop. • new 7 day a week service in Pickering to to meet the growth needs of Seaton and those requiring transit along Whites Road. • Approximately 7,000 additional hours to support service reliability for select routes most impacted by known construction projects. • Approximately 5,000 additional service hours to improve reliability on select routes most impacted by increasing congestion. While these proposed enhancements is a good start, there remains much more that DRT will need to do to restore a level of public confidence in Durham’s Transit system through a more robust approach to community engagement. For those living in Pickering, I will be hosting a DRT Town Hall, Monday, March 21st at 7pm in the Arena O’Brien Room A & B in the back of the Chestnut Hill Developments Recreation Complex-1867 Valley Farm Road.